Physical Immortality and Living
Running From Intimacy
Immortality is about eliminating the fear of intimacy. It's about wiping out the consciousness of death, so you can really express all of your passion without fear of loss.
What I've experienced in my own self, and in others, is a deep fear of totally giving yourself to another person. This is what keeps people on the run. It keeps them moving even when they find someone they want to be with.
So many times people have said to me, "I've found this amazing person. He (or she) is the person I've always been looking for." Then they're with that person a month, two months, six months, maybe a year, a few years... and then they're looking around again - running from the intimacy they really could create with this person.
We have so many images about what intimacy really is. Is it when you meet each other for the first time, and you don't yet know anything about each other? Is it when you begin to feel excited, and your hormones start flowing through your body? All this is wonderful, but it's no more than a connection you've made for the moment. It's not what intimacy is about - if it were, then you would always be looking for someone new, as soon as these feelings began to fade with the last person.
Is intimacy when you have been with the same person for a certain length of tirne? No - another way to run from intimacy is to stay with someone without having anything new. You may say you really love each other, but you are not really feeling any freshness. You are not stirring each other in any new way, you are not building each other - you are just there. You may complain about your relationship, but you don't move in any deeper. You are running too.
You can only achieve intimacy when you close all the exits to anything else, and really go for the quality you want with the person you're with.
Human beings have been running from each other for thousands of years. You say it's your sex drive? You can call it whatever you want, but it's still running. You say it's your hunger for freedom, that you can't stand to be tied down? I want you to know that you can have a relationship with another human being that builds and nourishes you.
Relationships don't die naturally - people kill them. But instead of killing them, we can make them more.
There is a deep fear of the type of closeness I'm talking about. Human beings have not known this closeness before. We've only known marriages and relationships. What I'm talking about has nothing to do with either - it has to do with you making a decision, with every cell of your body, that you're ready to quit running from intimacy.
A Person Who Stays
It has always been easy for human beings to leave one another. If things weren't just right at home - if something went a little bit wrong - then we've allowed ourselves a way out.
You may be living with someone, and yet you don't feel in love with them right now. I know that being in love takes on many different forms over the years. It doesn't stay the way it was when you first came together.
I want you to know that there is a newness of living possible for you in your everyday relationships with one another. There is a decision required of you to make this freshness possible, though. You must decide to close the door to leaving the person you're now with.
There may be times when you're experiencing a problem with the person you're living with. You may be feeling vulnerable, and hungry for somebody to really feel you. Someone else may come along just then and give you exactly the touch you think you need. You may feel a strong temptation then to give up on your current intimate relationship and start a new one. What you need to do, though, is to take that vulnerability and hunger back into your intimate living, and give it to the person you live with.
I want you to have such a conscience with other people that you could never come together with somebody and then leave them. Don't say, "Well, if it works out..." or "Whatever happens, happens." Be responsible. Don't think that two people can "try each other out." It's true that you can't know everything about one another when you first come together, but you'll never find it all out by testing each other: the knowing only develops from being together through it all, come hell or high water.
I want our togetherness to get better and better, moment by moment, because we put our whole selves into it - because we leave ourselves no way out. It takes something to remove these death responses from our bodies. It's not always easy - but I like it that way! I like it when I have to do some real moving and changing in my own intimate life to make it as beautiful as I want it to be.
You can have everything you want. But as long as you have an open door to run, you'll never create a solid intimate living. You're going to keep running, and I'm going to feel the running in you. I'm calling out for a body of people who have ended the running in themselves. I'm calling out for you to become a person who stays.
The Auction Block
When you're falling in love with a person, if you're not taking them whole, then what you're saying is, "I'm waiting to see what this person is going to do for me." What you're doing is putting them on the auction block. Human beings should not be put on the auction block to see if your feelings are going to be strong enough to accept them.
Don't enter into a relationship then, until you really know if you're going to go all the way with that person! You may say, "Well, how do I know?" Well, you won't find out by making a little qualifying list, where you grade them on a scale of one through ten. You can know in your body, though, if you'll make the decision that you're going to know.
What I'm calling for is a solidness with one another where it's safe to feel everything together. We can be sensual. We can love each other. We can feel sexually excited with one another. There is nothing wrong with this.
But there is something wrong when we use sexual excitement to exploit one another, when we abuse one another. People cultivate their sexuality in many ways. Many are so good at being sexual that they manipulate with it. They use their sexual desirability to get control of people around them.
This is so wearing, because you have to keep it up all the time. You always have to play this role. And once you get somebody sexually excited, you raise their expectations, you lead them on for a while or you avoid them, until pretty soon you're off with someone else. You're always worried about what you've created and what you've got going and what's going to happen next.
Many people say, "Well, when I start talking to this person, and I begin to feel close, I don't know what to do with it." When they feel this way, most people either withdraw or they charge. One or the other. And this is what I'm concerned about. I don't want the withdrawing or the charging anymore. I don't want you to go after something you really don't feel, or to compromise what you really do feel.
I want us to feel the excitement, without having to dissipate it. I want us to be so solid with each other. There is nothing more exciting than to really be with someone, and to build a nourishing, wonderful, exciting living with them.
Many people feel strong sexual desires. There's nothing wrong with this, but it's not necessary to use and abuse bodies with our sexuality. It's better to masturbate than to use somebody for a few hours, only to leave them.
There are people who want to sleep around with everybody. They want to take other people part-time. This kind of so called "free sex" is not healthy. It reflects a careless attitude. I've watched the freedom of sex affect people who were together in a living - they're not together anymore.
This kind of sexuality will distract you from your real living. If you're living with someone on a daily basis and you're not totally happy with them, and your eyes are wandering all over trying to find some guy or girl who will really do it for you, then you're not available to be with me, or with anyone else.
If you are drawn to someone who is living with another in an intimate living, you have no business falling in love with that person. And if you don't feel this way, you're playing with fire - you will cause destruction. If you're living with someone, and somebody else is attracted to you, tell them you're not interested! This kind of separation doesn't only affect you - it touches me as well, and everyone around you. We must support the intimate livings around us, whether ours or someone else's.
The living I'm calling for will bring you more freedom than you've ever known! You'll be so solid with the person you're with that you'll be able to call upon them for a new freedom of movement: not free sex or "free love," but a freedom of touching others and feeling sensual with other people.
It's wonderful to feel sensual with one another. I want a caring for one another that's very rich, that allows us to touch one another, to feel sensual, and even sexual, with each other. I have an intimate living that I'm not willing to throw away, yet I will never turn off from you. I don't ever want anyone to shut down their aliveness - I want the energy we experience together to always be on the increase.
Chasing A Relationship
Whether you are currently in a relationship or not, it is important you feel secure about yourself, so you are not trying to make yourself complete through a relationship.
This relationship insecurity can take so many forms. You may feel like the little woman worried if she'll ever find a relationship. Or you may be the man wondering how many women he's going to have, or if he'll ever find someone to settle down with. You may decide to pursue someone out of a fear that you will miss them otherwise. Then when you do get involved with them, you can become so afraid that you're going to miss someone else.
This fear of emptiness can create a stalking of one another. Then, even when you find a relationship, you don't feel the completeness you are looking for, because it can't come from someone else - it has to come from you.
This constant chase is what wears human beings out. It wears you out. It's time you start trusting yourself and who you are. The chase never ends, until you put a stop to it.
Be so excited about living that you're motivated by a fullness in your life, and not by a lack.
Become wrapped up in the living of who and what we are together on this planet. Have such a feeling about yourself, such self-steem, that you trust yourself. Know that out from this living you'll draw someone to you. You don't have to go out chasing after people anymore, you'll draw someone to you.
It's very normal for human beings to experience sexual intercourse. If you want it, it's good - but it's only for the moment: you have to keep doing it, constantly, to experience that orgasm.
I am very sexual, and I experience the fullest in sex, but sex is not my fulfillment. It's normal, it's good, but it doesn't fill me up.
There is another kind of intercourse, though - a cellular one that causes an orgasm to take place that doesn't end: that's what I find fulfilling. I'm talking about an intercourse between the cells of one another, an interchange that doesn't rise and fall, but that just keeps on growing. It's the living of one another, the togetherness, the energy that runs high and feels good. I love it.
My being with other people, my experiencing all that I am with other human beings - that is the fulfillment I've always hungered for. You are that which satisfies my longings - all of them.
Our being together, our movement, our action with one another, our interaction, our giving to each other, our pleasure, our enjoyment together - it causes something to take place in the physical body that has for me never happened before. It's a continual orgasmic experience. It is so fulfilling that, even though I still enjoy sex, I find I don't need it the way I once did.
I really want it to be for all of us that we don't have a need for sex, that it's just a normal functioning of the physical body. It was once considered to be the most wonderful experience that people could have together, but now we've surpassed it. I'm not saying we should stop having sex, but that we should stop experiencing the need to be filled up with sex. It's something to enjoy together, but it's not the ultimate - you're the ultimate.
Let's go past the need for sex. I want us to take our creative energy and use it to bring about a society for human beings that's never been before. Let's create a living together that every person on this planet can share, and find fulfillment in. Let's create a cellular orgasm that will never end.
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